be the kind of mom you want tess to be...
take care of yourself.
get enough sleep!
exercise a little bit every day to get the oxygen and endorphins to the brain.
eat right.
drink plenty of water.
read before bed.
meditate every day.
be sure to pamper yourself without feeling guilty.
you're better when you feel better.
so what did i do? work my tail off at work, go to the grocery store, make dinner for the fam, watch tv and stay up too late! ugh... i need to be better to myself.
so, even though it's o'late-thirty, i'm going to go draw myself a bubble bath. at least then i'll be clean, and hopefully won't break out in an allergic reaction from the bubble bath, and hopefully the scent of the suds will override the yucky smell of our iron-saturated well water.
night!
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Friday, September 2, 2011
starting afresh...
i thought this background pic felt like starting afresh.
what do you think?
does it drive you nuts that it's out of focus?
what do you think?
does it drive you nuts that it's out of focus?
drama, dumb luck, and lamentations
oh my goodness. there has been some drama.
drama at work, drama not at work, drama at home - DRAMA!
i am not a fan of drama. i generally flee from it. and by flee from it, i mean i think it is a huge pain in the butt, and when it comes along, it bothers me greatly. if it bothers me enough, i usually just cut out the people or things that have brought it. however, when the aforementioned things or people are not... removeable... (shush, i can make up words if i want to), then what do you do? i guess, suck it up and try to move on.
so that is what i'm doing, but can i just say, i am dern tired of drama, and i am even more tired of "hard luck".
i feel like in the past two years, i have had my fill of hard luck, bad luck, and no luck. it has not rained, not poured, but MONSOONED a tidal wave of negativity down on my heart, and i am done with it.
to top it all off, andrew knocked the side mirror off the scion, and then i realized that it's overdue for its registration renewal and inspection, which it now won't pass because, duh, it's missing a side mirror! which means that the money we were given to enjoy our 4-year wedding anniversary will likely be spent on fixing the mirror so that we can spend more money to get the registration updated. just like my christmas present of riding lesson money was spent on refilling our propane tank to heat the house last winter, and my birthday money was spent on tess's daycare tuition in july, and how my vacation time from work was paid out to take care of the credit card bill last month.
and that's not even the half of it.
i want so badly to just get my head above water. i want to stop wishing and wanting and hoping i can attain this elusive sense of financial security - something i had always had, simply from being a responsible and hardworking person - something that feels like grasping after mist now. i don't want a fancy new car or shoes or clothes. i just want to buy groceries that taste good, rather than the ones that are the cheapest. i want to take a day off of work to do something fun and not spend the whole time feeling guilty that i should be making money. i want to take a drive and not feel guilty that it's costing me $15 to go into town, i want to go to a nice restaurant and order what i want, not what's less than $10. and i want a damn vacation! BUT i would be satisfied if i could just feel assured that at the end of the month, our income would exceed our necessary expenditures.
thumper rule, be damned. THAT is how i feel.
drama at work, drama not at work, drama at home - DRAMA!
i am not a fan of drama. i generally flee from it. and by flee from it, i mean i think it is a huge pain in the butt, and when it comes along, it bothers me greatly. if it bothers me enough, i usually just cut out the people or things that have brought it. however, when the aforementioned things or people are not... removeable... (shush, i can make up words if i want to), then what do you do? i guess, suck it up and try to move on.
so that is what i'm doing, but can i just say, i am dern tired of drama, and i am even more tired of "hard luck".
i feel like in the past two years, i have had my fill of hard luck, bad luck, and no luck. it has not rained, not poured, but MONSOONED a tidal wave of negativity down on my heart, and i am done with it.
to top it all off, andrew knocked the side mirror off the scion, and then i realized that it's overdue for its registration renewal and inspection, which it now won't pass because, duh, it's missing a side mirror! which means that the money we were given to enjoy our 4-year wedding anniversary will likely be spent on fixing the mirror so that we can spend more money to get the registration updated. just like my christmas present of riding lesson money was spent on refilling our propane tank to heat the house last winter, and my birthday money was spent on tess's daycare tuition in july, and how my vacation time from work was paid out to take care of the credit card bill last month.
and that's not even the half of it.
i want so badly to just get my head above water. i want to stop wishing and wanting and hoping i can attain this elusive sense of financial security - something i had always had, simply from being a responsible and hardworking person - something that feels like grasping after mist now. i don't want a fancy new car or shoes or clothes. i just want to buy groceries that taste good, rather than the ones that are the cheapest. i want to take a day off of work to do something fun and not spend the whole time feeling guilty that i should be making money. i want to take a drive and not feel guilty that it's costing me $15 to go into town, i want to go to a nice restaurant and order what i want, not what's less than $10. and i want a damn vacation! BUT i would be satisfied if i could just feel assured that at the end of the month, our income would exceed our necessary expenditures.
thumper rule, be damned. THAT is how i feel.
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