8 weeks of puppies: week 1

as many of you know, we have taken on the responsibility of fostering ELEVEN dogs! originally, i thought it'd be 9, but what's two more? hah! so the story is that we have a local woman who owns a store in cameron village called cat banjo, and she runs a dog rescue out of the store - how cool?! well, she always brings her dogs in to work, and we've gotten to see these poor creatures come back from literally death row at the shelters all around the state (and sometimes neighboring states), to happy, healthy, well-loved pups with great homes! they don't have any facility, since it's not a shelter or anything, so they rely on foster families to care for the pups once they've left the hospital.

this dog in particular was so sad to me. she was HUGE with puppies - we thought she had 8 in there, and we thought she'd deliver as soon as she arrived at work. however, her contractions stopped, and a week went by with her hanging out in her "birthing turtle" upstairs. on wednesday, we got the word that they were either going to induce or do a c-section... but the doctors changed their minds. then on friday the same thing, and then finally on sunday, we went through with the c-section. somewhere in there, i found out that this dog, iris, and her puppies did not yet have a foster home... and who in their right mind would take on a dog and her 8 puppies?

well, i thought, i'd love to be useful, and i've always wanted our house to be a home for all - a place where people could come to get away and have respite. it just seems right, since we don't have lots of money and can't give thousands of dollars to charities, and we aren't active in a youth group (something i always foresaw for myself) or busy with church things (since we aren't very close to either of the churches we attend and currently have a car-hating 1-year-old), but we do have a lot of land, and it is a great place to just sit and be. so since i've always wanted our house to be that for someone... and i thought, well, it's not a PERSON, but it would still be helping 9 dogs - and that's good! so andrew and i discussed it, and we decided that if they were ok with having the pups grow up (for their first 8 weeks of life) on our porch, then we'd be happy to have them.

so sunday came and the c-section/spay commenced. the uterus was pulled out of the mamadog, and the babies were peeled out of their birth sacs one by one. 8 or 9 volunteers and i stood around the table, peeling out puppies, suctioning their mouths and noses, shaking them, and rubbing to stimulate them to breathe... and live! usually in large litters one or two pups won't make it, and with SUCH a large litter, i was prepared for that, but when it was all said and done, all of the puppies and mama came out of it with flying colors. we went to counting. by this point, we were actually pretty sure there were 9 puppies. ok, i thought, 10 extra dogs, what's one more? but when we counted them all... for a shocked 3rd time... there were actually 10 puppies! poor mamadog! i can barely handle 1 baby!

so that night, andrew, tess, and i went to andrew's work to build the whelping box to take to our house. it took a long time because once it was built, we had to take it back inside because it wouldn't fit in the van! andrew had to cut the top 3 inches off to get it to fit. but, we got it home and all set up. i went in to work on monday, and brought the pups home that night. unfortunately, that's when the weather decided to start sucking, and we began the days of cold COLD rain. mama and puppies had to stay inside the first few days, but after she pooped in my bedroom and kept trying to break out of the dining room, we decided they had to go outside, like we'd agreed. we set up the box with lots of blankets and towels, and 3 comforters (it's a large box), and put a packing blanket over the top to keep the heat in. we even bought a heat lamp, but after feeling the heat under all the covers, we decided they'd be warm enough through the night. and they were! each day, i checked the pups to make sure they were all still alive, i was so sure we'd lose one or two just from the size of the litter, but they continued to thrive!

thursday, mamadog had been particularly frustrating. though we'd taken her out to go to the bathroom literally 7 or 8 times by mid-morning, she kept trying to (and did successfully once or twice) jump out of the box. not a good idea for a dog that was just split open and sutured up! she also began vomiting. so, i packed her and the puppies and tess into the car, and off to the vet we went. when we got there, it turned out that she was just SO FULL of poop (despite the fact that she'd been pooping like crazy all week) that she just didn't have any room for food and needed to empty out. we deduced that she must have been over-eating. usually an undernourished dog nursing 10 puppies should be allowed to eat as much puppy food as she wants, but it appeared that this mamadog was just so used to being deprived that she thought she had to gorge herself lest the food disappear. so she stayed overnight at the vet for some fluids and no food. and we modified her diet to a limited number of cups per day, and she kept pooping like a champ, stopped vomiting, and we brought them all home the next day.

since then she's been pretty regular, pooping twice a day and eating two cups each meal. she did get stapled up to fix the stitches she'd popped jumping out of the box, and andrew extended the top of the box over a foot higher so that she cannot jump out anymore. so far, so good! mama and babies are doing great after week 1 [click to see each pup on their fb page]. their eyes and ears are still closed, and they mostly sleep and eat all day, but that's what babies are supposed to do!

[some photos blatantly downloaded from cat banjo - credit to debbi cochran.]

tess the turtle turns 1!

holy moly. today, my tiny baby that was born yesterday (or so it feels) turns ONE YEAR OLD!!! hallelujah, we're all still alive.

and in honor of this momentus change from baby to toddler, i've changed the blog's title from andrew, emily & baby tess, to just plain tess. crazy. it's all so unbelievable.
a- i can't believe i actually procreated (if you knew me back in high school or college, you understand the irony of that statement), and
b- i can't believe that it's been A WHOLE YEAR since she was born!
i literally remember it like it was yesterday - being told that i was going to be induced, sitting in the rocking chair on the porch and trying to compose myself, knowing that our life here, as a family of two, would never be the same. and i was right.

being tess's mother this past year has been the most crazy, wonderful, stressful, enlightening, trying, amazing, wild ride of anything in my life. we have dealt with an early arrival, jaundice, the bili light, and seemingly thousands of heel sticks, acid reflux - and 3 different medicines, diet changes, etc to try and ameliorate that, a child who HATES the car with a fiery passion, co-sleeping, no sleeping, nap strikes, and more. but we've been blessed with the sweetest, smartest, super observant, loving, funny, sensitive, silly, most amazing child in the world. and i would not trade it for anything.

yesterday, we had tess's first birthday party, and i think it was a real hit! several of her baby friends were there, including madeline mhoon, graham cutchin evans, elena mccombs, emily rodrigues,

and our cousins nathan and randi ogan!

(their respective parents were also there) we had a blast playing with crayons, chalk,

bubbles, sand in the sandbox, stickers, eating cake and cupcakes,

and having a cookout picnic in the yard! i wish i had more pictures, but once again, i was too busy living the party to photograph it. andrew got some good ones of tess and her cake, and i know my parents got some of the baby interactions, so once i collect more photos, i'll post them to our flickr group.

we had lots of friends and family help us set up and decorate. then, we handed out gift packages for our attendees, which included fun things to play with at the party. we wore our sunglasses, colored in our books, blew bubbles, pretended to play ring toss and other party games

(but mostly just held on to them and threw them around).

we went out to the new sandbox - a temporary one while we're waiting on our new swingset.

we watched tess destroy her smash cake (and i think she would have eaten the whole thing if we hadn't cut her off!) - she is truly her mother's child.

then we had a cookout picnic in the yard, complete with sausage dogs, hot dogs of all varieties, barbecued chicken (made by chef rick welch!), fruit salad, chips, animal crackers, goldfish, cookies, and much more!

last, tess opened her presents from her generous friends. she got lots of contributions to the swingset fund, a car and furreal kitty from nana and grandpa (the hit of the day!), a turtle bouncer from emily r, some dolls and books, and a walker/roller toy from mom and dad! everyone headed home, and family helped us clean up, though there are still chips, cookies, and sundry other junk food options taking over my kitchen!

we are so appreciative of all of our loving friends and family who blessed us by coming out to celebrate and helped to put a great exclamation point on tess's first year!

thank you! we love you!

time change, teeth, toddling, and two days till a year!

well hello friends! it's been awhile, and yes, i MISSED the 11 month update! ugh, how do you make it almost a whole year and miss month 11?? you have a crazy 11 month old, i guess! [as a sidenote, i started this blog yesterday, obviously, so you'll have to excuse the fact that it's getting posted one day before her actual birthday.]

in a month's time, SO much has happened in the development of tess. she's gone from 0 teeth to 4, with several more right under the gums! she's gone from crawling and "cruising" with an occasional attempt at walking, to preferring walking as her mode of transportation - which leads to lots of falling, and subsequent scrapes and bumps, but luckily she's a tough girl. she loves playing with ALL her toys... at once. but especially the ones that make music so she can dance to it - and yes, she knows what "dance" means! she will dance when the music comes on, dance while in the stroller, dance while eating, and light up when you ask her if she's going to dance - sooo cute!

if you know her, you know that she knows what she wants. for example, this morning she wanted a clementine - NOW! she has this very annoying (you can say that about something your kid does, right?) sound that she makes when she wants something, and it gets louder and more persistent until she gets it, like a fire alarm. it's sort of like, "uh uh uuuh", or "ah ah ahhh" but very short and sharp. and then when she sees someone she wants to go to (or a bottle or food) she makes this very small round mouth and goes "ooooooo" "oooooooo" - but the oooo-ing is not annoying. anyway, once i translated the persistent ah ah into "i want a clementine", it was so adorable to watch her holding her baby orange in her two baby hands and trying to peel it open herself!

she's doing lots of things herself these days, or trying to at least. the other day, i found her trying to put on her own socks. she already finger feeds herself whenever possible, and just this morning, i found her trying to undo the child lock on the cabinets. this is extra-impressive considering that the way it works is to hold the "key" (really a specific magnet) up to the location on the cabinet that you've attached the child lock (not visible from the outside) and holding it there while you pull open the door. i had left the key within her reach, and she was holding it to the cabinet and pulling as hard as she could on the handle! she's just so bright and observant, i have to be careful what i do in front of her already!

i have lots more to tell you about, blogworld, but it will have to wait till our next entry, because i believe the FIRST BIRTHDAY PARTY!!! deserves its own blog ;-) stay tuned!

chomp, chomp, chomp!

we have teeth!

one day last week, i'm trying to remember which day, i looked into tess's mouth and saw more than just bumps beneath the gumline, i was pretty sure i saw teeth! but, i put my finger in there and didn't feel them, so i was a little confused. i know the gums become rather transparent when babies are close to getting their teeth, but i was sure this was more than just transparent. it wasn't until later that day, when tess had begged to drink from my glass, that i heard the "tink tink tink" of her little baby tooth on my glass - i was right! there was a tooth in there!

it was really hard to see until today though. this afternoon, as we were having our lunch of spaghetti noodles with alfredo sauce, when i got a really clear view of one tooth clearly above the surface (lower right incisor) and its pair (lower left incisor) just barely under the surface! dr. mann said that when she started getting teeth she'd get them all at once, and i guess he's right! we've started a new song when she's eating - i go "chomp, chomp, CHOOOOMP!" while i make my fingers look like a chewing mouth that chomps its way to her and tickles her neck. she LOVES it!

tess is learning what these new teeth thingamajiggers can do, and today, as she was gnawing away at her teething cookie, she began scraping it across her teeth, looking quizzically at me as if to ask what was going on and why the cookie was scraping off into her mouth instead of just gliding over her gums as it had before. then, the most interesting thing happened when she bit down, and the cookie broke! she was excited for sure! teeth are quite remarkable to one who's gone almost a year without them!

as i type this, she is enthralled with her one and only tv show, the dvd of "baby's first noises" by the baby einstein company. you have no idea how thankful i am for them! it is really the only thing on tv that interests her (which i take as a positive thing, so she's not glued to it any time it's on), but she enjoys watching it each afternoon with her teething cookie and apple juice, and it gives mommy some much needed mental break time (since my sweet angel DOES NOT SLEEP during the day, and so i rarely get a break then)!

i would post an adorable picture of her chomping away at that cookie or sucking down her noodles or even of the inside of her sweet little mouth - but i can't find my camera!!! i am so bummed! all these milestones and nothing to show for it :-(

ten months of tess!

i know, i know, i say it every month, but HOLY COW! can you believe that my tiny baby is just two months shy of a year old?! i absolutely can't!

i started writing this blog on saturday night, which would actually have been ON TIME for her 10 months, but the internet died sunday, and we didn't get it back until yesterday, so i'm just now getting around to the post. oh well! c'est la vie when you have a kid!

i'm trying to think of what all has changed between 9 months and 10 months. since i've been working and trying to take a little time for myself here and there, i feel like i'm missing stuff (or just don't know every little minuscule detail of every single day). but there are definitely two developments tess has made, first off...

she can climb the stairs. every single one of them. talk about mommy freaking out. apparently when i went to work on saturday, tess started trying to climb up them with daddy, so he TOOK HER TO THE TOP OF THEM??? (no clue why this was a good idea) to see if she could actually climb them... and she could. then (as depicted in the video), the next day, i decided to see it for myself, and she literally climbed up each and every stair, ALL the way to the top. i nearly had a heart attack. now i'm thinking that in addition to the baby gate between the living room and the rest of the house, we need one at the top AND bottom of the stairs! it's going to be like living in an aqueduct.

oh, and it's not the second major development, but another thing she has begun doing is pulling things down on herself rather than pulling herself up... like the grate in front of the fireplace. yowza.

but the second major accomplishment is...
drumroll please...
on 1/26/2011
tess took her first step!
i doubt she's going to be full-on walking anytime soon, but it was very exciting nonetheless! she has been trying to span the gap between pieces of furniture recently, and i see her reach from one piece to another and ponder how to make the distance, but always, she either does some sort of dive to the floor, or she sits down and crawls. this time though, it was different! tess was standing, holding on to the large ottoman in the living room, like she usually does, pulling things off of it, like she usually does, and trying to hand them to me (a relatively new trick). so she grabbed an envelope, and reached to give it to me. i reached out, but had not yet grabbed it, or her hand, when she took one step towards me and then plopped down on her bottom. it all happened so fast that i had to process a moment before i realized that she had taken the step all on her own. i started squealing and clapping and telling her what a great job she'd done, though i'm sure she had no idea what was going on. it was pretty awesome, and i was so excited that i got to see it! of course, i have no picture or video, since it was a total shock, but i'm sure we'll get something soon enough.

as far as daily life goes, tess eats TONS of organic baby food along with cheese, puffs, yogurt, pasta, and some of pretty much anything i'm eating. we nurse in the morning, sometimes in the evening, and sometimes during the day, but she drinks 6oz formula bottles several times a day as well. and all that leads to TONS of pooping. i mean this kid is a poop champion. in a 24-hr period, she poops no fewer than 3 times, usually 4. people talk about their kids "getting backed up", and the other day when i told mom i was giving her cheese, she asked if that would happen - i started cracking up. we can only hope such a thing would happen! i mean i'm not complaining about having a child with an amazing digestive system, but 1-2 a day would be just fine with me!

sleeping and napping is off and on. most nights she sleeps from about 7:30pm until 7am, waking once or twice, but a week or so ago, we had several sleepless nights when she woke up practically every hour. andrew and i blamed it on teething, but so far we still have yet to see those suckers make their triumphant entry into the world. she's also been napping pretty regularly between about 10 and 11, depending on when she wakes up in the morning. unfortunately, as that nap has gotten longer, the afternoon one has begun disappearing, apparently backwards of what most kids do, but this is tess we're talking about.

she is now wearing 9-12 month clothes, which seems right on track to me, since she is between those months, and yet supposedly she is still a shrimpy. oh well, so are her parents.

as far as stats go, we're majorly estimating this month:
head - who knows. cute though! starting to grow SOME hair :-)
length - maybe half an inch longer than last month? not much taller though. :-/
weight - based on our scale/weigh, add baby and weigh again method, we're going with 18 lbs. we WILL make it to 20 lbs by birthday!

...and now the beast has awakened, so i must go keep her from climbing the stairs or pulling things on top of her head. perhaps pictures to come? we shall see!

hi, my name is mama.

recently i have wanted to blog. sometimes, i even have time to blog! and with a baby growing by the second and fast approaching the 1-year mark (eep!), i'm sure i have ample material about which to blog! and yet... no blog. i guess i must have bloggers block. or possibly, i'm just sticking to the thumper rule. not entirely sure which.

see the thumper rule in my life, dictates that i not blog about personally unhappy things that involve others - for example, issues in my marriage, at work, or with my family are off-limits. but i've always been pretty open about blogging about issues in my own head. and i've had a lot of those recently. so why no blog? ...i guess i don't want to sound like i'm complaining all the time. one time a friend told me my blog was "manic-depressive". i looked back through it, and i agreed, but what's the point of writing about the mediocrity? the good - blog! the bad - blog! the mediocre - meh.

i have lots of online friends who keep tabs on baby tess through my blogs and facebook status posts, and i feel like they only know the bad stuff and the frustrations, because, since there is no one who actually lives near me to physically go to, and no one who's off work or available to talk to on the phone whenever i'm having a breakdown or major frustration, i tend to put it out there into cyber-land. and i have realized that the people who read this stuff probably think i hate being a mom, or that i don't love my daughter, or some other awful things like that. when the truth is that i LOVE being a mom, and i honestly believe that i have the best daughter in the history of the world. i, lovingly, believe that she is also one of the worst nappers and most social (great with people, cries without them) kid ever as well, which can be tiring to a person who is alone, in the middle of nowhere, with no other adult to interact with, for a minimum of 10 hours a day. in fact, it is only within the past two weeks or so that she has begun taking naps longer than 35 mins in her own crib, and that of itself has been kind of amazing.

that being said (and the baby still sleeping!), i shall delve, but a bit, into the crazies in my head. i feel lost and frustrated and alone. i feel cut off from friends and family, and i feel abandoned by many of them - whether realistic or not, it's how i feel. i feel like i work so much (either at work or at home) that i am constantly exhausted, yet my house is a disaster, and i'm always running late. i don't like the way my body looks, but i don't have the money to buy healthier food, and i don't have the time to work out. you might think i'm just saying that i don't have the time, but unless i were to do it at 4:30am or 10pm, i really can't. and i've thought about the 10pm option, but i'm just so tired by then (and know i'll be woken up in a few hours), that i can't pull myself off the couch to do it.

i'm frustrated that i stay home with my girl a lot, but i don't feel like a good mom. i constantly wonder if i'm giving her all she needs, if i should be trying to teach her more, if she should be weighing more, why she isn't sleeping more, why haven't i been teaching her sign language, why don't i make her food at home anymore? and i have no answers.

lots of people have asked me recently if i miss teaching. "no, i don't", i say. i miss students, and i miss impacting their lives, but i don't miss institutionalized "teaching" at all. there was a time when i felt like i was in the right place, doing the right thing, being a great teacher. then, it turned into "holy cow, how will i make it through the next 2 hours?" and then, "how will i make it through this day?" and this week? and this year? and every second was torturous, waiting until the day was over, and i could not be at work anymore. when that happened i knew it was time to leave teaching. many days i feel like that at home. i count the hours, then minutes, until 7pm when andrew arrives home. and it isn't that i don't love being with my child, and it isn't that i want a "new job", or that i want to go back to work full time. i don't really know what it is other than perhaps i'm frustrated that *all* i am is mama.

i'm so in love with the fact that tess can say mama, and that she means she wants me when she does. when she falls down - mama! when she wakes up - mama! when she's hungry - mamamamamama! when i've left the room - mamamamamama! when i've gone to take a shower, and dada's watching her - mama! when she's laying on my chest, and i'm pretending to be asleep so she'll get sleepy, and i sense her looking at me, and i open my eyes, there's her sweet face, inches from mine, mouthing without sound - mama - and smiling. i love it, and i love her, and i love that she loves me. but there's no emily left. and i think i'm struggling with that.

emily was in shape. emily rode horses. emily made money. emily had time for friends. emily made great dinners and enjoyed going out to fancy restaurants. emily sang at church, taught colorguard, played he guitar for summer camp, and danced around like a fool to country music and rode the bull at bars! emily was fun and wild and spontaneous.

and mama? people ask me what i've been up to. and i say, "work and taking care of a baby" - and they look at me, expecting more. "yeah but what else?" exactly.

9 month tess and merry christmas!

well, it's christmas eve, and several days past tess's 9 month birthday, but i've been busy living life instead of writing about it! i do apologize for my lack of posting, but between baby, family, and work, i just don't have a lot of time for me - since blogging is pretty much something i do for myself, though i appreciate that you all partake in the reading :-) but that's ok, i wouldn't have it any other way right now.

sweet baby girl is getting so old so fast! she had her 9 month pediatrician appointment this week, and her doctor, dr. mann, basically told us she's a genius (which we already knew). she's way above average for all of her developmental milestones and, in his words, "one of the most social 9 month olds i've seen in a long time." yep, that's my kid!

she loves pulling up on anything and everything. she looks like a rock climber, looking for her next hold and pulling herself along every obstacle. she lets go with one hand, then the other, standing for a few seconds on her own before falling on her bottom. [behind her baby gate prison]

she eats tons of solid foods, including most all fruits, veggis, and starches, chicken, turkey, and beans, and now some dairy like cheese and yogurt. she's still breastfeeding in the morning and evening, but she drinks bottles of formula during the daytime. she's sleeping through the night, with few middle-of-the-night awakenings, and goes to bed around 7:30 and wakes up around 5:45 but will snuggle in the bed for an hour or so nursing, cuddling, giggling, and playing with mom and dad. i love it. it makes me so sad when i have to get up early for work and can't take advantage of snuggle time, but i recognize how blessed i am to get that time with her most days.
tess loves playing with toys, reading books (especially books that play sounds or songs), being tickled, singing the "eensy weensy spider", making faces, squealing and shrieking with joy, meeting new people, waving, clapping, and dancing with mommy or daddy. she says the words mama and dada and knows what several other words mean including no, hungry, and eat. she can pick up little pieces of food with her fingertips and get it into her mouth. she CAN use a sippy cup and hold a bottle for herself, but prefers for mom and dad to do it. she LOVES bathtime, and she does ok for naps. naps have been a challenge her whole life, but as i type, she has been sleeping for almost 2 hours, the longest morning nap i think she's ever taken in her crib! she's moved into a convertible carseat - in "cowmooflauge" print, and we hoped it would help her enjoy car rides more... it sort of does, maybe. i think she's more comfortable in it, but as long as she's rear-facing, i think she'll be unhappy in the car. which, according to dr. mann, will probably be until she's about 18 months due to her weight.

and on that note, 9 month turtle stats!
height - 26.25 in (10th percentile)
weight - 16 lbs 5.5 oz (15th percentile)*
head circumference - 43.5 cm (45th percentile... for her huge brain)
*she hasn't gained much weight since her 6 month visit, which both surprised and concerned me, but dr. mann said it's ok because she is still fine for her height/weight ratio, and she must have been using most of her energy to grow tall instead of wide. still though, i'm going to be pumping her full of formula and food to make sure i'm not starving my poor baby! ...and also to get her in the front-facing weight range as early as possible!!!

these days we have a more normal-ish schedule, definitely for bedtime and wake up time, but her first nap is usually somewhere between 9:30 and 10:30, she eats solids 3x/day, and her second nap is usually around 1:30 or 2:30. occasionally there's a quick third snooze around 4ish, but not every day, and usually that one is in the car traveling somewhere. other than that, we spend our time playing, hugging, dancing, and going places (usually like wal-mart for exciting things like dish detergent). i'm working 2-3 days a week - monday, saturday, and every other wednesday or thursday, so i'm up to 20-30 hour a week at work (which i think i already explained before), which i enjoy. unfortunately, during the weeks that i work 30 hours, the house usually ends up a wreck, and that's embarassing, but what 'ya gonna do??

the only two areas tess seems to be behind in are her teeth - still none showing, though the doctor said when they start, she'll probably get lots all at once, because they're all right there; the other being hair. i don't think she's officially "behind" per se... but i would love to clip a little hair thing in there (no huge bows please, but a little one would be sweet!), but alas, her strawberry locks are probably 2 cm at longest!

[tess helped decorate!]
[and helped pick out and bring home her first tree!]

alright, well the turtle has awakened, and i must get back to the christmas eve festivities! have a blessed christmas weekend!

"For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16