nights

tess's nights have been interesting. when she was just home as a newborn, she hardly slept at all, especially compared to other newborns, and during the night she would eat on her regular every two hour schedule. holy cow.

then with the bili-light, which weighed so much that it would pull over her bassinet, she started co-sleeping with me on the couch near the outlet that we'd plugged the box into. she started going longer, every four hour stretches.

the co-sleeping continued for some time, and at 3 months, much to my dismay and probably due in part to the reflux, she was STILL co-sleeping, BUT she had begun sleeping for long stretches at night. 6-7+ hours, followed by 4 hour stretches, and she slept until 10:30 most mornings. people looked down on me for sleeping with my girl, but at least we were sleeping!

then somewhere between 4-5 months, we began changing her over to the co-sleeper (a bedside attachment, similar to a pack-n-play, but smaller), and the sleeping went to waking every 2 hours, with a possible 3-hour stretch in there. ugh. by the middle of the night, we resorted back to co-sleeping in the bed because i was just falling asleep nursing her. waking time became erratic, sometimes 5:30am, sometimes 7 or 9 or 10:30 with no detectable pattern. yuck.

at about 5.5 months, we'd developed a pattern, put her down around 9:30, she'd wake up around 12:30, then it was a 4-hour stretch, and then every two hours until around 9:30am. not ideal, but at least it was a pattern. however, that little sleep began wearing on me, and so andrew started trying to do a middle-of-the-night-formula bottle, which sometimes led to another 3-4 hour stretch, and sometimes didn't. her waking time again became erratic. and that's how it's been until about a week ago.

we decided it was time to move tess to her crib (upstairs - eek!) because she's getting a bit large for the co-sleeper. night 1, it worked like a charm, she went to bed up there, had a middle of the night bottle, and got up in the morning. HALLELUJAH! we were so excited. i tried to get her to nap in the crib the next day, but she just kept waking up SCREAMING and sounding like she was terrified. after several (hours of) attempts, i finally let the poor thing sleep in my arms, where she continued to wake up screaming until she felt that i was still there. we tried again that night, and only screaming continued until i just felt horrible for her and gave up. she would not sleep without being IN MY ARMS for that whole night. i felt like we'd gone back in time because we'd tried to push her to hard. i was heartbroken.

then, yesterday we went to the fair, and so there were no beds for naps. since we were there for 9 hours, not counting travel time, she spent some time in the stroller, slept in the carrier, and slept in her carseat on the way back. last night, we put her down in the co-sleeper, and she didn't wake up except to eat. early in the morning, i was tired and started falling asleep while she nursed. rather than staying in my arms, she rolled over and literally DOVE headfirst into the co-sleeper (don't worry, it's about 2 inches lower than and attached to the bed), and when i tried to straighten her back up, she did it again. so i laid her back in it, and she went to sleep. the next time she woke up, i fed her, started falling asleep, and she did the same thing! so i laid her down (not on her head), and she slept until we woke up for the day!

it's amazing when your baby just TELLS you what she is ready for! clearly, she wasn't ready to be all the way upstairs in her big-girl crib, but she didn't want to stay in mom's bed (which we are all thankful for!) anymore. what a smartie! i guess we'll do the co-sleeper until it's unsafe, which won't be long with the way she's moving around now, and then have to try making the move to the crib again.